Want to know the number one way to help someone help you in your emotions?
Step 1: The next time you are angry or upset or worried or anxious or sad or depressed, tell them to ask you, “Are you carrying someone’s emotion?”
Step 2: See Step 1.
You see, we are energetic beings. And because our emotions are also energetic, we can occasionally (more often that we think), pick up someone’s emotion and carry it with us.
PROBLEM: We unknowingly pick up people’s emotions and then begin to feel those emotions as if they were our own.
Don’t mistake this for empathy, though. Empathy is a good thing. Carrying someone’s emotions is not! It means if someone is angry and you start carrying it as well, now they are still angry, and you are angry too! And who wants to deal with their own sadness and anxiety as well as someone else’s anger? That just seems way too overwhelming.
But don’t worry. If you are carrying someone’s emotions, it is so simple to give them back (without affecting the unbeknownst donor), and you can feel better! You can learn how to give emotions back on this post titled, “Carrying Emotions and How to Give Them Back.”
So because of all this, the number one way to help someone help you in your emotion is to have them ask you this question:
“Are you carrying someone’s emotions?”
Let me give you an example.
Just this past weekend, I started to get quite anxious about some possible upcoming changes in our family. These are just regularly, everyday changes that happen in a home where people live and children grow up. They are kind of no-bid-deals, and they had never caused me to feel anxious before, but suddenly, I was feeling it.
It even felt logical that I was worried about these things. Who wouldn’t be? I thought.
But these issues were all I could think about.
I worked hard all day to not reach for my phone and text my husband about the topics again and again. I had already expressed my anxieties to him, and because of the nature of the changes, there was nothing he could do about it.
I paced the house, could hardly concentrate on anything else, and found myself getting impatient with loved ones because these changes were out of my control, and I was so stressed about them!
This lasted for TWO WHOLE DAYS.
Finally my patient husband finally thought to ask the question that pulled me out of my anxiety.
“Are you carrying someone’s emotions?”
Aha! I knew the answer right away! I was carrying someone’s emotions!
Once I knew this, I visualized all this anxiety that looked like fog surrounding me, and I gathered it up and handed it back to the person who gave it to me. (Handing it back never actually affects them. And it ALWAYS lifts the weight off me!) Immediately, I felt so much better. I was not worried about the changes anymore. My anxieties and fears about the situations were gone. And I had confidence that we would make it through.
I was so happy that my husband knew enough to ask me that vital question that led me to finding instant relief.
SOLUTION: Having someone ask us if we carrying someone else’s emotions can help us identify what emotions are actually our’s, and which ones we can get rid of.
Who is in your life that you vent to? Who is close enough to you that sees you when you’re frustrated or when you’re anxious? Who is aware when you are feeling sad and down?
Teach this person (or these people!) to ask you this question. Explain to them about carrying emotions, have them read this post and the above mentioned “Carrying Emotions . . .” post, and then ask them to help you by asking you:
“Are you carrying someone’s emotions right now?”
Having an outside support remind you of your ability to successfully work through your emotion is life-changing! And don’t forget to be that person to others as well!
Leave a comment or send me a message about a time when you recognized you were carrying someone’s emotions and how it felt better to give them back.
And if you haven’t tried it yet, DO IT! You will be amazed at how much better you can feel!